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Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Hi. My name’s Bridgette Reeves. I have a son who is 16, and his deficits are ADD and ADHD, learning disabilities, sensory integration disorder, auditory processing disorder, and now we have Crones Disease.
We live in Kershaw, South Carolina, and it’s a rural, a little small town.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
OK, so start by telling me when Brandon was first diagnosed.
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
He was first diagnosed in kindergarten. He didn’t know his days of the week. He didn’t know his birthday, things like that. He was having trouble in school staying focused. We took him to the doctor and they immediately said that he had ADD but they gave him Adderall and it didn’t help.
So we went from there doing a lot of psychological evaluations in the public school system to try to get the help he needed. And, for no avail, they kept saying he was pretty much borderline. And borderline basically means that his, according to the school system, his IQ was basically 72. Getting the help would mean he would actually have an IQ score of 70. And he didn’t. So he didn’t really receive any services.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
Brandon was probably pretty upset feeling this way.
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Well he didn’t really, well the thing about it is Brandon, with his issues, he didn’t understand. He didn’t pick up the social cues. So he didn’t understand why he was being punished, or why we were so upset, or why the school system was upset with him. He might have known that I was a D minus of an F on his report card and he didn’t finish his classroom stuff.
He picked up on I’m dumb and I’m stupid because of the fact that the kids in the classroom were calling him that because he got an F on his report card. So when he come home, than we would punish him and send him back to school, they would punish him because we punished him; you know it was going back and forth.
And what happened was, he came home. He was very upset, and we yelled at him again, punished him and took things away from him, and he ran to his room, and that’s then he tried… tried to commit suicide with a knife and a um… with a belt. And after that we knew we had to change his environment. And now he’s happy.
Well, it took a lot. We had to go through counseling, six or twelve weeks after the fact. And since we didn’t get the help we needed in the public school system, I found another way to help Brandon.
So I looked up on the Internet a school, Glen Forest School, which is a special education school in Columbia, South Carolina which is 70 miles from our home, and he went for two solid years.
Now we’re home schooling. So we’ve been home schooling now, this is our fifth year.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
And why did you decide to home school him, Bridgette?
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Well, at the point in time, going to Glen Forest School, the tuition when we first started was only 14-thousand a year, which… which my mom and my husband sold a few things, and we got him there the first year. Well the second year rolled around, and it went up to about 15, and so my husband’s family cut some trees on their land, and then they got him there the second year. Well, the third year rolled around; he was going into middle school which would have been the sixth grade, and we just couldn’t afford it any more.
At that point in time Brandon had already built up his self esteem and we were on the right track of his reading and his math, and it seems like the public school beat him down so far, as far as his self esteem issues, that I didn’t really want to send him back. And he didn’t really want to go back.
I also had the opportunity of getting him the TEFRA which is Medicaid here in the state of South Carolina, and that allowed him to do speech therapy, OT therapy and I got a lot of assistive technology programs for him.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
So then, what’s your hopes for Brandon Now?
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Brandon is fixing to be seventeen in December, and my hopes and dreams are to send him to technical college, maybe, and then going onto a four-year college. He wants to be a computer programmer, and we’ve been doing a lot of stuff here at home to gear him up for that. He’s already finished three to four books of like visual basic computer programming books.
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Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
So then you decided to home school, so how’s that been going?
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
It’s been great; very good. The first year was pretty tough ‘cause I had to get to know his needs and you know where’s he’s at in learning. What level he’s on.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
You’re not a special ed teacher, I mean, how did you approach getting a curriculum, getting what you needed to make it work?
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Well, basically when he was going to Glen Forrest School, I talked to the teachers there. And I talked to other home school mom’s as well. And I chose the Ubbeca Program ‘cause it’s two years nationally compared to the state. We’ve been using it ever since. If he was in public school
Right now, he would really be workin’ on a 12th grade level versus he’s working on a 10th.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
But you’re telling me that he may have had a very low IQ,
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
True but that goes along with working one on one. See in public school, there’s 30 kids in the class. Even though he had a low IQ according to them; I’ve never had an IQ on my own to determine where’s he’s at. But they said, the public school said, that’s he’s actually scoring a 72 on his IQ, and they were saying that these are minuses and F’s are all we’re going to get out of him. Well, bringing him home, bringing him to a home school environment, and bringing him into a private school special ed classroom helped change all that. Now he’s learning.
Two years ago I took him to the Home School Association and they evaluated him and from only home schooling two years, he has jumped up from a second to third grade level in reading to a high school level . In math he jumped up from a third or fourth grade level to an eighth grade level.
Now in the deficit part his spelling and vocabulary is still lower because he has ADHD and short-term memory. He doesn’t do well with memorization. So two years ago he was scoring on a fifth grade level.
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Bridgette Reeves (parent):
When Brandon was having problems in the public school system I vented a lot on the Internet, and I vented a lot in the Lancaster newspaper in our area. And what happened was I wrote a few letters to the Lancaster News and all of a sudden, you know, it was getting overwhelming. My husband told me to stop. He said that basically you are carrying this too far. So I quit writing letters, and then I noticed that a couple of weeks later that two more parents were writing letters basically with the same issues as my son and I have.
So I wrote in the Lancaster newspaper of trying to get them to contact me. And what happened was that letter went out on a Wednesday, and Sunday 22 parents had already called me.
We started up a parents’ support group. Once we started having monthly meetings on a regular basis, then I started getting a few parents regularly come. Then I started opening up another world of contacting guest speakers from around South Carolina; just whatever interests they had, like wills and trusts. If you have a special needs child who needs a wills and trusts fund, then I would get an attorney to come in and they would discuss how to set up a trust fund for your special needs child.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
But then after all that the people in your group are much broader than the deficits that Brandon has.
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Oh yeah. In our group there’s many many disabilities or disorders. I mean, it can range from Autism to ADHD to very profound severe handicaps. It’s just a wide range. But the thing is we all deal with the same issues which is speech therapy, OT therapy, IEPs, 504 plans, the school system, private school;, home school, we all deal with the same issues so what we do is we talk and we share information with each other.
I have 110 parents on our e-list. We have now a website. I have a blog. We meet still on a monthly basis. We have probably a good ten to twelve regulars that come.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
So what’s your group called?
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
It’s called POPS: Parents Offering Parents Support:
www.pops-supportgroup.webs.com/
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
Do you think that you are the organizer?
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Oh, yeah. (laughs) I’m the organizer. (laughs) But there may be some point in time that I may turn it
over to another parent ‘cause Brandon, like I said, is getting older and you know there’s other parents involved and who knows what the future will hold.
LINKS: POPS: Parents Offering Parents Support
http://www.pops-supportgroup.webs.com/
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Bridgette Reeves (parent):
When I first found out about Brandon’s issues and I was dealing with the public school system, I had no clue about a 504 plan. I had no clue about the IDEA, no clue about what Brandon’s right’s was or even what my rights was.
So as the parents and I got together and learned from each other I found out that if Brandon had stayed in public school I could have asked for a 504 plan or speech therapy or OT therapy and I could have found the ways of making it happen, but not knowing that I had no clue that I could ask for that.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
Yeah, but what I am curious about is do you have any regrets about taking him out?
Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Well, um, at the point in time where Brandon was I don’t regret it, but I wish now I knew the knowledge that I could have had back then because it would have made me have a better sense of understanding of what a 504 plan was or what an IDEA law was. You know, I would have been able to ask for assistive technology whereas before I had no clue what assistive technology was. But see now these parents that we meet every month, they know what assistive technology is; they know what to ask for in those IEP meetings. So I don’t regret it, but I wish I had more knowledge years ago.
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Bridgette Reeves (parent):
Looking back I think the more you know the more you will be able to handle things. The more knowledge you gain the more you are going to help your child. Knowledge is the answer. If you don’t have that knowledge of going into that IEP meeting or going into a situation, then you won’t be able to help your child the best that you can.
Listen to Bridgette's entire story (mp3, 10:53)
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Brandon Reeves (teenager):
My name is Brandon Reeves and I am 16.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
So tell me how you like being home schooled?
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
It’s great. We do art and math and science. We go on field trips a lot, went to museums and stuff. That’s about it.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
Do you think you have to be really disciplined, I mean that to me would be the hardest thing would be to be working at home when you don’t have anybody necessarily looking over you, although maybe your mom has to. What do you think? Does she or not?
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
No, probably not. She doesn’t, she doesn’t have to have anybody watch me. Me and her, me and her do the school work together, get it done, and then we’re free for the rest of the day.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
How much time do you spend?
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
Well, about six hours, maybe seven. Somewhere around that.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
A day, on schoolwork. So what are you working on today?
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
Uh, art and math and a little bit of chemistry.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
Wow. Chemistry. What are you doing? Did you do the volcano yet?
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
Yeah, we did the volcano.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
That’s pretty cool.
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
(laughs) We did the volcano.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
So now you want to go to tech school, right? Tell me about that.
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
I want to go to York Tech and become a computer programmer and then graduate and then, I guess go to work and then that’s about it. (laughs)
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
So when you look back on what your mom’s done,..
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
She taught me, taught me how to do my math, and then she taught me, she taught me to do my English and everything else, so we did a pretty good job.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
So are you a little nervous going to a tech school ‘cause you’ll be back in the classroom again?
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
No. “'Cause I think, 'cause I think it’ll be a lot easier now.
Alyne Ellis (interviewer):
Well, it sounds like you think you’ve got skills now.
Brandon Reeves (teenager):
Yeah.
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